Air : Hotel California (Eagles)
Credit : Mildly bawdy. Qe'van, 1999
Here I stand on the platform
Shimmered out of thin air
Now up steps an ensign
Putting flowers in my hair
While I walked to my quarters
A crewman asked for a light
He lit a doobie and I rubbed my eyes
Quite an unusual sight
Then I opened my doorway
And saw her standing, bare
I was thinking to myself
"This is the craziest ship anywhere"
Then she handled my candle
And she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor
I thought I heard them say
Welcome to the Starship California
Such a lovely ship (such a lovely ship)
You can take a trip (you can take a trip)
Plenty of room on the Starship California
In all of time and space (All of time and space)
There's no higher place (There's no higher place)
Her nose is crinkly and twisted
And her joints backwards bend
She's got lots of kinky, kinky toys
She likes women and men
How they dance in ten-forward
Buuuuuump and they grind
Like the feeling when you go into warp
Reality left behind.
Then I noticed the Captain
And then she noticed me (and she said)
She hasn't felt the deck move like that
Since the 'big one' in sixty-three
And then voice comes over the intercom
And in the accent of the Valley Girl
You can hear this song
Welcome to the, like, Starship California
Such a, like, lovely ship (such a lovely ship)
You can, like, take a trip (you can take a trip)
Like, living it up on the Starship California
In all of time and, like, space (All of time and space)
There's, like, no more tubular place
Bobbing head dog in the window
Fuzzy dice on helm (and she said)
"We are all just fantasy here
In our fantastic realm."
Then in the Captain's chambers
They gathered for a soak
Cranked jacuzzi way on up on high
Then they got high on smoke
Last thing I remember
I was floating out the door
I was floating down the passage back
Down the endless corridor
"You see," said the first mate
"We are...freakin' far from home.
Do you think we could deal with that
If we weren't forever stoned?"
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